Katy Bourne


Intention

POSTED ON December 31, 2012 | POSTED IN: My Blog | 3 Comments

At the start of each yoga class, my teacher encourages us to set an intention for the practice we’re about to do. I’ve found this to be a helpful and clarifying exercise. Now, as we wind down the old and venture forth into the new, I’ve been thinking about what my intention is for the year ahead.

As I was kicking around the idea for this post, a friend asked me what the difference is between an intention and a resolution. In my mind, an intention is the purpose behind the things we do. It is a soul thing and has everything to do with how we want to feel and how we want to be in the world. A resolution is a more about what we want to do. It’s an action-oriented and accomplishment-driven item on the life list for any given year. Up until this year, I’ve been focused on resolutions. But I’m doing things differently this year.

For the past several years, my resolutions and goals have been very career-centered. My focus has been on work, building my business and establishing some kind of professional footprint. This has not necessarily been due to ambition as much as it has survival. I’ve done what I’ve had to do to take care of my family. Creative aspirations and expression have been important for sure, but they have definitely been influenced by the need to make a living. Interestingly enough, as I read back on old journal entries from the past few years, I realize that there are some boulders that I am perpetually rolling uphill and that many goals remain unrealized. It makes me wonder if doing visualizations, riffing on abundance and petitioning the universe are really meaningful. I honestly don’t know anymore.

So then what?

Lately, as I ready for another turn of the wheel, I wonder if I’ve had it all wrong these past few years. Although I have pursued it doggedly, I don’t think it’s really about career for me anymore. I think it’s about connection, presence and proximity. It’s about people.

My kids grew up in a heartbeat. Although I’ve been there every step of the way, this particular realization hit me hard this year. They’re both teenagers now and, at nineteen, one is technically an adult. The days of feet pajamas and little sticky fists clutching candy canes are a faint memory for me. Part of their job now is to pull away, push off and establish themselves as the glorious and beautiful individuals they are. Both of my boys are right on target in that respect. But as they move through this important process, they need less and less of me. My job as the mom is slowly winding down. Although this is the natural flow of things, nothing in the parenting books really prepared me for the loneliness of this shift. It is another one of life’s reminders that time screams past us or, as Gretchen Rubin so eloquently puts it, “The days are long but the years are short.” As such, I want to soak in as much of them as I can before my boys take flight completely.

Beyond motherhood, there are other relationships that I would like to focus on in the year ahead. My own mother is in her eighties. Although she lives a significant distance from me, I want to continue to reach out to her as much and as often as I can. Closer to home, there are relationships that I can nurture a little more. There are also new people in my life, whom I would like to get to know better. I hope I have the courage to do so. Connection, presence and proximity. The joy of what we create and who we are is in sharing with others. Without other people, what does any of it mean?

So I guess my intention for the New Year is to start with the heart. Of course, I will continue to do what I need to do for my family, but the year ahead will be less about security and achievement and more about love. This is an easy enough intention to set. But I know my mind and my fears and how both can muddy situations that should surely be crystal clear. When I need clarification, I will ask myself the following:

Is there an opportunity to be generous here?

Is there something I need to let go of?

With any luck, the answers to these can point me in the right direction when I am confused about what my heart is trying to say to me.

So that’s it: a simple intention to start with the heart and go from there. I wish you all a Happy New Year! I hope that you have fun, that you know great love and that your precious heart is open, full of grace and blissfully at peace.

***

“Let’s find focus & find a deeper love. We need to love & be cool to each other.”

– Raja Gemini

Comments

3 responses to “Intention”

  1. Jill S. says:

    Katy,

    This is really lovely. I started setting intentions several years ago. For some reason, resolutions feel so finite to me. And once I have “failed” at keeping a resolution, I find it harder to return to it. But with an intention, there is a built-in acknowledgement that I will have to keep returning to it. That my focus will wander and I will fall off the path, but there is permission to return and refocus.

    I wish you gentleness and compassion as you negotiate this transition.

    • admin says:

      Thank you for visiting the blog! Thanks also for your comments.

      I like what you have to say about returning to your intention. It will be interesting to see what the year ahead will bring in respect to my intention. So far, it feels like a huge weight has been lifted.

      Thanks again for dropping by the blog. Happy New Year & Namaste to you!

      Katy

  2. DIna says:

    As always, I enjoy your writing, Katy. Intention. I like what you both have shared. I too love the part in yoga class where we set our intention. It has given me clarity regarding what is really important. As I sit here typing in the airport on the the way to see my 92 year old dad, I feel joy and eager anticipation. This is a brand new thing. I send him good wishes and love all the time, especially when setting my intention. I know he can feel it, because I just know. It’s so great to have him in my life. But back to intention vs. resolution: two different things entirely. Jill,you nailed it. My New Year resolutions never include giving up anything. I write down stuff I want to get started on, post it where I’ll notice it often, and chart my progress. This past year’s was somewhat ambitious, but I will carry some of it forward and se if I can make it happen perhaps this or next year. At least put it out there. Acting on this stuff is part of the growth for me. I need to feel deserving, and look at what’s in my way. Never hurts, always enlightening. Occasionally entertaining. I wish you bluebirds in the spring. You know the rest.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Join Katy's Email List

© 2017 Katy Bourne | site by Origin Web Design | photos by Steve Korn

Katy Bourne is a Jazz Singer and Writer.