Seattle, May 2016 As he put a few remaining things into his backpack and took care of a couple last minute tasks, like vacuuming his room and boxing up his computer, it took everything I had to keep from crying. Trying not to cry takes enormous effort. It’s like wrestling a bear or beating back a wildfire. My chest constricted. It was hard to breathe. A swell of sadness rolled through my body, too strong to contain or manage. But I…
Last week, I received the heartbreaking news that a friend’s very young son had died. This child was a tiny warrior with an old-soul demeanor. He endured more challenges in his short time here than many of the rest of us will face in a full lifetime. Despite his suffering, however, he seemed to float above it all– Zen-like, calm and full of love. When I heard of his passing, I was stricken with an immediate and crushing sadness, not only for his death but…
I’m losing my ambition. This is probably something that a person shouldn’t admit, especially out loud on a blog post. In our culture, we place a high value on ambition, even celebrate it. Ambition is equated with forward motion, something fresh-scrubbed and enthusiastic. “Lack of ambition,” on the other hand, conjures up the image of a bleary-eyed, vapid stoner wasting his/her days away, playing X-Box in some dim living room. The unambitious are typically presumed to be slackers. Losers even. But is that really…
The Nomad in Houston It’s now been four months since Emmett took off on his trek to explore the U.S. When we spoke on the phone this past Saturday, he was about an hour outside of Washington D.C. Assuming that all went as planned, he arrived just in time to see how Independence Day is celebrated in our nation’s capital. Nice move, Emmett. At the time of my last post, Emmett was just pulling out of Houston, where he stopped to…
Cousins. Axel & Emmett. New Mexico, April 2015. It’s now been roughly two months since my son Emmett took off to live as a nomad; traveling across the United States to see what he can see, to experience new things and to generally explore the magical and mysterious path of life. Since my initial post on this story generated so much interest, it seems an occasional update is in order. This is my first report. The preliminary part of Emmett’s trek…
On Saturday morning, my 21-year old son Emmett took off on an extended road trip to explore the United States and, possibly, points south in Mexico and Central America. He loaded the last of his camping gear into his car and we said our goodbyes. Although I tried very hard not to, I cried. Aside from a few stops to visit friends in a couple of states, Emmett has no firm itinerary. His plan is to be nomadic. I won’t know where he is. I…
This all started with a very large bag of flour. A few months ago, my 21-year old son Emmett and his friend Tucker needed a kitchen to make some bagels for a potential business venture they were considering. Although Emmett has his own apartment, he doesn't cook there–too many cockroaches. (At one point or another, most of us have lived in such a dwelling. It’s a young bohemian’s rite of passage.) They asked to use my kitchen and I, being the proud and supportive mom of…
Circumstances have a way of taking unforeseen turns and sometimes we find ourselves in a situation of living apart from our minor children. There can be a multitude of reasons–divorce, financial issues, geographical moves or even the kid’s own choice–but typically this is not the scenario we’d envisioned when we became mothers. We imagined that we had more time, at least 18 years, and we didn’t expect to be staring at an empty nest so early in the game. It’s a course shift of epic…
Dedicated, with mad love always, to my fabulous E's. Mother’s Day. For such a quirky little holiday, it sure kicks up a lot of emotional dust. I'm not particularly sentimental but I've been reminiscing a bit lately. In honor of the day, here are 15 things I wish my mother had told me: 1. It’s important to take care of yourself, no matter what. You have to attend to your physical, emotional, mental and spiritual needs on a daily basis. Sleep. Eat clean. Breath deeply.…
